Dating Scams

Anyone who tries online dating knows there are several dating scams out there. The more common scam is the military scam. These guys pretend to be military – typically they will claim to be U.S. Army. And “conveniently” they are currently deployed.

It’s kind of funny, none of them claim to be Air Force or Marines. It is always Army, in my experience.

Now, notice I said “conveniently” deployed. There’s a few reasons this is convenient.

  1. They are not available for meeting if they are not in the country.
  2. Delayed responses can be blamed for the time difference.
  3. They are going to ask for money.

If you are trying online dating, and you are not familiar with military please, please, please educate yourself!!

  1. Know key terms – for all branches.
  2. Know what information is available and what is considered classified.

Pay attention to how real military members talk!

First off, I was married to a military guy – I was with him for 15 years. I’ve also dated/chatted with two others – all three were a different branch of the military.

So, how do military guys talk? Personal experience: they are like going to the eye doctor and having to read that eye chart. They are so used to the terms that it is automatic. They don’t break it into “civilian” or do they sound formal.

Actually, most of them don’t want to talk about military. So, some tips to know it’s probably a scam:

  1. It’s one of the first things mentioned.
  2. They are deployed.
  3. They don’t answer in a timely manner – gives them time to look up information.
  4. They don’t talk like military guys I’ve chatted with.
  5. Look at their pictures. Know the rules for hair cuts AND facial hair!! If these guys are true military that means they have drill every month.

Ask questions. Always, always, always! If they are real military, they will answer. If the answer comes out formal jargon – they are probably a fake. If they say it is classified or they are not allowed to say that – they are probably a fake.

So, what are some common questions or comments from these scammers?

  1. U.S. Army and are currently deployed.
  2. Have you ever been with a military man before? (They want to see if you are an easy victim. Plus, playing on the idea of every woman loves a man in uniform.)
  3. Are you currently talking to a military man? (If you’re already being scammed, they don’t want to step in.)
  4. They need money, or a gift card of some type. (I don’t care if they are in a war zone or not. THEY HAVE ACCESS TO THEIR MONEY. THEY HAVE ACCESS TO THE BX (like a shopping mall on base for Air Force – each branch has their own term for it.)) Real military has access to all of this.
  5. Profile picture – usually one or two pictures only. Usually will be in their BDU’s (battle dress uniform). Pay attention to the BDU’s. Are they current? (Military occasionally changes style/pattern. PLUS, they will look different depending on where they are deployed.) So, scammers find actually military pictures and claim to be that person. Pay attention to patches on the clothing – do the stripes match the rank they claim? Are the patches correct?

So, protect yourself. Know what questions to ask. Find a friend who is actually in the military and double check information if you need to.


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